My Bizzare Neighbours

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I currently live in Kent, through no choice my own though as I was booted out of my last home when someone robbed me. (Yes really I was the one who had to eave the house because the owner didn’t believe me as it could only have been one of his two best mates who did it)

Anyway my friend Sarah and her boyfriend were moving and said I could have their old house which a nice little place but only really suitable for one person. I sweafr they place the most dysfunctional people on this street now as my neighbours are FUCKED UP!!

Firstly there’s the weird trumpet guy who plays the trumpet loudly literally all day and night. I don’t think he has a job. Then there are the locals at the pub at the end of the stereet who hoot and cheer whenever I walk past and always have fags in their hands and cheap cider. One of them is a tramp I hink as a couple of times now I have caught him going through my bins. But who really takes the buscuit is the crazy cat ladywho lives next to the pub. SHe has at leas 12 cats and her favourite hobby is carrying a bag of cat shit up and down the street and standing outside your house staring in smoking. Once she carried a little trolley of cats up the street and I am always finding cats outside my house or peering in at me from the roof.

I swear I was destined to have weird neighbours- the hippy in Bracknell and now all this lot. I dont know who lives up the end of the street and I would rather not know. Tere are so many pissheads, drggies and single mums aroud this town it’s unreal!