This is something that I have been debating writing about for a while now, for fear of sounding patronising or arrogant, but after discovering a few media outlets have published false information about the subject, I feel it is time to set the record straight!
The “trigger” for me, was due to a wonderful email I received this morning from a lovely lady who had read an article about my career, and told me how upset it made her feel, that “a woman of such a young age felt there was no other place for her to fit into society”, than to enter the adult entertainment industry. There was a lot more to her message, but it was quite deep and personally aimed at me, showing she had clearly put a lot of thought and effort into writing this, which left me feeling like something of a fraud, as she had chosen to invest time into reacting and responding to a piece of information she had consumed about me, which is entirely untrue!!
First off, I would like to state that I am not “bitching” about the media/press in any way, as every single article that has ever been published about me either online or in print, has been nothing less than positive and full of praise, which is very rare for articles regarding the adult industry and the people who have worked in it! I am extremely flattered that the national (and even international) press have used words such as “inspirational”, “pioneer” and “brave” etc to describe me, and it is only one small phrase that I have taken issue with, which unfortunately is one that could throw my entire career story into question.
The phrase/sentence in question, is one that states I entered the adult industry in an attempt to “feel accepted”, which is NOT TRUE!!! The other frustrating thing about this, is the fact they use the inverted commas, as though it is a direct quote from myself, which it is NOT! It isn’t clear to me whether they are claiming I did it to seek acceptance socially/professionally/generally in life, but none are true, and this could throw my otherwise solid career backstory into question, as I have given detailed interviews to other media outlets, both written and on film, speaking about the TRUE reason. This true reason being that I had carefully researched and structured a five year career plan, that would ultimately result in myself primarily working within the mainstream acting and comedy industry- A feat of which I actually achieved in three and a half years, despite a few major tragedies/setbacks within that time frame!
Now, I just want to make it very clear that I completely feel for, and sympathise with, any person who feels they have no choice but to enter that line of work for whatever reason, be it social acceptance/money/confidence etc, but the point I am making is that this was NOT my reason, and it bothers me that certain articles written about me, kind of angle towards this, with one even having written in the paragraph directly above, that I was accepted into Oxford University to study law, and how I was the branch manager of an office by the time I was 21 years old (Which is true by the way). Now I could be narrow minded here, but I’m not sure how many people would believe that an Oxford law student or an office manager would seek any kind of life acceptance via the porn industry as the PRIMARY REASON for entering it- I know several people in the adult biz who come from similar backgrounds to me, but they CHOSE to enter it for their own enjoyment and fulfillment (and are doing very well indeed) but the point I am re-enforcing is the fact it has been written with the angle that I felt I NEEDED to, which is a lie. Like I said, I could be missing a point, but in my opinion, it sounds as untrue as it is. It throws doubt on my entire story the way I see it, and I am very proud of my TRUE story, as I have put a hell of a lot of work into my career, in both the adult side, and the mainstream! I am aware this will inevitably make me appear somewhat patronising and “snobbish”, and I am fine with taking that risk, but it doesn’t exactly look great for my family who invested a lot into my upbringing and education, for there to be FALSE information publicly available about why I chose the career path I did. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I am fully aware that of course it is highly unlikely that any parents would particularly be thrilled for their offspring to work in adult entertainment, regardless of their personal background, but mine at least deserve to have the real reason out there, as opposed to having people think they failed me growing up! I am not sure if any of what I just wrote makes as much sense in written word as it did in my head, but I’m hopeful that it does!
There is a whole rambling about my five year career plan in the blog I posted before this, titled “My Most Open And Honest Interview”, so I don’t need to rewrite it again here, but please know that I had a very clear plan of how I wanted the years 2013-2018 to play out, and as a whole, I made it happen, even though it barely went to plan at all! I can now safely say however, than I achieved far more than I set out to accomplish, and feel I have changed emotionally, professionally and physically (health/fitness wise) for the better, and I hope to keep gaining more life experience…. preferably mostly of a positive nature!
I hope the above didn’t come across as sounding arrogant/patronising/stuck up- Anyone who has had contact with me should hopefully know that I am not of this nature at all, and that I simply don’t like false information being written about me, even though I know that the articles in question were 100% written with the intention to portray me in a very positive light, for which I am very appreciative and always will be. I also very much appreciate and cherish the wonderful friendships I have made through all stages of my career within the entertainment industry! I admire everyone in my close and extended social circle for various reasons, and hope to always be able to join in their celebrations and success. I have witnessed marriages, pregnancies, award wins, graduations, career transitions, major lifestyle changes, and many more amazing achievements by the people I have met over the course of these years, and have no doubt that I will be part of many more!
Thank you to those who have helped me create so many weird and wonderful memories over the years, and here’s to plenty more in the future!!
Attached is one of the photos from a lovely article written about my comedy career, by a national newspaper a couple of years ago! 😀