Off You Trot, Peppa Pig

Now I’m really not keen on sitting in a small room while someone pokes and prods my hands and nails for up to 90 minutes at the best of times, so the experience becomes 10 times worse when said salon is full of lunatics. I get bored easily and don’t care much for being “pampered”, but I kind of have to seeing as I work in the entertainment industry where unfortunately, a lot of the time you are judged based on physical appearance. I don’t agree with this personally, but I know it to be the case!

Anyhow I visited a nail salon in Camden, which was near where I was working that day. I was confronted by absolute silence as I walked in, with the several staff and customers all staring at me as though I had just walked in naked. Or dressed as a chimp. Or something. I had booked an appointment, and the lady at reception nervously told me to take a seat. There was a well dressed middle aged woman sat next to me, who seemed pleasant enough. This is when things really got weird….. The receptionist walked over to her smiling, and handed her what looked to be a high end fashion magazine. Said receptionist then picked up an iPad from a shelf, fiddled around with it for a minute or so, then proceeded to solemnly and silently hand it to me. On the screen, smiling morbidly back at me, was none other than Peppa Pig. I looked at the lady. She stared very seriously back at me. I awkwardly took the device displaying the famous swine, nodded and replied “ummmm….. thanks”. She nodded back and returned to her desk.

By this point I wasn’t sure what kind of emotion to feel, but I knew my appointment should have commenced about 15 minutes prior to the giving of the pig cartoon, so I asked how long it would take before I was seen. After a good five minutes of a slight language barrier banter, it turns out she had double booked me, and had given my appointment to the young girl who was already receiving treatment on the other side of the room. Needless to say, I was not impressed and walked straight out, but not before placing Peppa down firmly in front of the incompetent receptionist.

I have no idea why any of that happened, but the moral of the story here is: Just because somewhere is cheap and local, doesn’t mean it won’t be home to a hoard of fruitlops!

Fuck Peppa Pig anyway- no cartoon should look THAT manically happy. Cunt.